At times as a parent I became overwhelmed with the challenges. As a grandparent its not as frequent, but the remedy is the same. The one thing that I could always rely upon was the promptings of the Spirit. If I didn’t know what to do, I learned to pause for thought. Just stop. Take a time out. I was never disappointed. Always I came to know what was best to do next to resolve the situation. There are really very few instances when an action needs to be taken immediately. Often we just need time — sometimes just a minute or two and sometimes even overnight. In the morning I always knew what to do next. It was a better decision.
Taking time gives opportunity for perspective and when needed a calming down. Taking time can also give everyone a clearer understanding of the “why”. Understanding the why helps us to be better teachers rather than just tending. When I became a widow my children quickly learned that giving me time to think overnight was in their best interest. After a bedtime prayer and a night’s sleep I would always awake with a clear understanding and we could talk in calmness. I didn’t have my husband to talk with but the Lord had remained and was always there for me as well as for my child. Most often it was my fears that were put to rest, replaced with confidence in my child. When it was a “no”, the no was always came with understanding to teach. Over time my child and I built confidence in one another and in God. We were reinforcing a solid pattern for living. We were building pathways.
I was reminded of this principle as I recently heard President Deiter F. Uchtdorf speak of the pathway of “the power of knowing ‘why’.”
“When we understand why our Heavenly Father has given us this pattern for living, when we remember why we committed to making it a foundational part of our lives, the gospel ceases to become a burden and, instead, becomes a joy and a delight. It becomes precious and sweet. . . . The gospel is a light that penetrates mortality and illuminates the way before us.”
I have found gospel principles to be true in my personal life and in parenting. Little by little we teach these principles to our children in real life situations. It is gospel principles that are the pathway to happiness in personal and family life.
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